Selfless Siblings

Many special needs kids have extra special siblings who daily go above and beyond to help out, protect, and care for their brother or sister.  Many of them get little attention or praise for all their efforts because mom and dad are simply too exhausted and busy to notice all the little things they do.  These "normal" kids selflessly put the needs of their special sibling(s) above theirs and never complain that so much money, time, and attention go to help the kid next to them, while their own needs must come second.  Our daughter Lauren is such a kid.  She was born into a family with two older sisters each with special needs and into their world of therapists, specialists, counselors, doctors, etc...  Then, when she was just 18 months old, her brother was born.  It was apparent from the beginning that he was different from other children and needed lots of round the clock attention and care, since he almost never slept and cried for hours on end.  When he was diagnosed with autism at 23 months she was officially the only typical kid in our house, and that wasn't in her favor.  I was used to mothering in unconventional ways and dealing with one crisis after another.  What I wasn't used to was a kid who didn't need to be told everything fifteen times in a very gentle voice and with visual aides.  I've had to learn to listen to her when she stops me and simply says, "I get it, Mom.  You only have to tell me once."  She loves her siblings with all her heart.  She faithfully goes with me on twelve hour trips every other weekend to visit our daughter who lives in a hospital four hours away.  I've seen her many times grab her brother when he was headed toward danger and hang on for dear life while screaming for help as he dragged her toward a street.  She's such a blessing to all of us, but she's made it her mission to teach and help her brother.  She stands bravely by in the grocery store as he has meltdowns, grabbing my purse, his shoes, handling the cart, never embarrassed, she handles it like a six year old pro.  I thank God for sending us this precious little girl who has such a loving and giving heart.

More Fowers!

It was a BEAUTIFUL day for a bike ride.  I stopped and picked a few weeds for Brendon to fiddle with while he rode.  Before long I heard him saying, "More fowers!"  So of course I stopped and got him more "fowers" every time he said it.  Our sweet dog Pepper goes every step of the way whenever we go riding.  She's not about to let Brendon out of her sight!  :)

Playing in the Rain

Brendon loves to experience things from head to toe.  Running through the raindrops and splashing in the puddles makes him so happy!

Autism Induced Exhaustion

However rewarding being the parent of a child with autism may be, it's also exhausting. Indescribably so.  There's the hypervigilance required to constantly (and I mean 24/7) keep your child from escaping and wandering into a street or drowning in a nearby pool, burning themselves on anything hot while you're cooking, turning on a faucet and flooding your entire house, and emptying the contents of your refrigerator into the kitchen floor, all in the amount of time it takes you to run to the bathroom, When you combine that with the never ending insomnia that usually accompanies the autism diagnosis day after day and year after year, it can honestly make you feel like you're losing you're mind. 

When I meet a parent who raised a child on the moderate to severe end of the spectrum to adulthood, even the fact that they're both alive seems awe-inspiring.  I mean it.  That the parent actually kept their child from drowning, getting run over, etc... for that many years on almost no sleep gives them almost superhero status in my estimation.  :)

Adaptive Bike

A few months back, I entered Brendon in the Great Bike Giveaway Contest for an adaptive bike.  Many friends and family were nice enough to vote for him and when he didn't win a bike, several said they wanted to help get him one.  Several people sent money, either by mail or online, and with grandma and grandpa pitching in what we were short, WE GOT HIS BIKE!  :)  We are so thankful to everyone who helped purchase it.  He loves it.  After he learns to balance and hold himself up on the bike we can start teaching him to hold onto the handlebars and how to do the pedals.  All of the seat supports are removable and the pedals have straps for his feet.  We're on our way!

Memorial Day

Today has been a good day in our autism world.  Brendon "helped" Daddy grill out by standing close to the grill and shouting "HOT" every time John opened the lid.  And he repeated "Don't touch that!" Every time he heard us say it.  You have to understand that this time last year he stuck his hand into the hot coals of an open grill last year and so we spent the rest of that afternoon in an icy pool trying to get Tylenol down him without making him throw up too much.  It was awful. 
Today, we talked him into tasting the watermelon, and even though he called it "apple" we were thrilled! 
John and I both agree that he finally WANTS to talk to us, something that he hasn't been interested in before.  He has a few words that he's been taught to say and he uses them to request what he wants to eat or do, but lately, when he doesn't know what to say, he just starts repeating everything we say.  He even repeats laughs, coughs, and sneezes!  It's sad and funny at the same time.
He's been more interested in what we're doing, lately.  For the first time, I can see he's actually interested in repeating the words for the actions of what we are showing him.  It gives me hope.  Hope that he will continue to make progress and that next Memorial Day he'll be talking to us and interacting with us even more. 

If only...

He can't talk my leg off or ask a thousand questions like a typical five year old can.  If I could just know what he's thinking...